The New Years Resolutioners - you know all those people who flock to a gym right after new years because they made a resolution to get into shape. They make the gym so overcrowded that it becomes miserable just to train. You know the same idiots that will spend a ton of money on gym clothes, membership, etc. and you will never see them in the gym after a couple of weeks. Ah, and that time is fast approaching once again, man am I glad I don't have to deal with that anymore.
The Coffee Drinkers - you have to train in the morning to notice this fine breed of gym goer. You know the guys and gals that just sit on the machines sipping on their Latté carrying on a nice little conversation with their fellow coffee drinkers while you are busting your butt. They will do 1 set every 10 minutes.
The Flirting Bimbo - all you guys know who she is. She is the hottest girl in the gym but she is also the most annoying. She is the one that comes up to you after you have just blasted out a set of squats from hell and bats her eyes at you then proceeds to ask you "can you please come take these plates off the leg press, they are just too heavy for me". To which I would say "Hell no, what do I look like, your personal trainer" You know how moody one can be after doing a set of brutal squats.
The Two Goofballs - Ah one of my all time favorites. These are the two retards that pay for a membership to sit back and check out the chicks. You know the two guys who are buddies, with bodies that would make Steve Erkel look like Arnold Schwarzenegger, the ones who just take up gym space to oogle at the ladies. I hate these guys; they do nothing but get in the way.
Ah, The Bench Presser - this guy really cracks me up. You know, the guy or guys who will train chest every day of the week yet still wonder why in the hell he isn't making any progress but still swears his way is the best way. They will do multiple sets of flat bench and throw in a set of flies for good measure I guess. Talk about an idiot.
The 165lb Mr. Olympia (or at least in his mind he is) - this is the fellow who is in decent shape and has some decent muscle mass but ruins it all with the way he carries himself. You know, walks around like he has latts as big as Ronnie Coleman's with his arms sticking out 3 feet from his sides.
The Spandex Lady - This one is not a pretty sight to see. The lady who really needs to loose about 75 more pounds before she tries to squeeze that lard into a tight fitting spandex shorts. Lady, let me let you in on something, NOBODY WANTS TO SEE YOU IN THAT so do us all a favor and just wear some sweats.
The Screamer - talk about annoying. This guy doesn't accomplish anything in a gym but annoy the hell out of everybody. This is the guy who is doing some squats and is screaming to the top of his lungs with each rep. The problem is it just doesn't stop there; he will do it for each exercise so you have to listen to his crap all night while training.
The Personal Trainer wanna be - nothing annoys me more than while I am in the middle of a set and this poor excuse for a physique comes over and offers his unwanted advice. Always critiquing the way you are training and that his way is so much better. Hey buddy, if your advice is the best why don't you look any better than what you do.
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The Serious Person (that would be me and I don't think I am an idiot but most of the people think I am by insane look while training) - when I get to the gym the first thing I do is put my fanny pack on, pull out my headphones and get in my own little world. Then I get the, if you talk to me I will kick your butt, look on my face. I grab my belt, straps and what ever else I may need on that day of training. When I am in this zone I don't like to be bothered. You know me, I am the guy that after doing a heavy set of dumbbell curls I will take and slam the weights down to the ground because I have just pushed myself through a pain barrier that no body else in that gym has ever done and doesn't even have the guts to do. I never look at anyone in the eye. Everyone avoids me until it is finished. Then as quickly as the all out assault started it is over. Then I come back to the real world and once again I am a really nice guy, until the next time I train. I guess this is why people think we bodybuilders are crazed idiots.
I am sure you can relate to most if not all of the people I have written about. If you are one of these people and are offended by what I wrote, I say so what. Get over it and change you view towards training. I hope that this amused you and next time when you go to the gym it will help you be able to pick these idiots out really fast in order to avoid them. Well, until next time.
When you do your last Rep, do one more to GROW on.