| I feel many people can relate to my story and may be inspired by it. So here it goes, here is how I came to be the person I am today. |
Now I'll be honest. I normally am very skeptical
about writing generic articles. I mean let's face it,
motivational articles are a dime a dozen. However, I
feel many people can relate to my story and may be
inspired by it. So here it goes, here is how I came
to be.
Imagine fear. Not physical fear. That's not the
worst kind. Imagine mental fear. Imagine fearing
going to school everyday. Not fear of being beat up,
or not doing well, but fear of being the butt of every
joke, fear of not being accepted by anyone, fear of
being beaten down. Throughout all my elementary
school and middle school years I had been severely
rejected by my peers. I was different. I wore
glasses, I was hyperactive (diagnosed with ADHD at age
7), but I was a good kid, a caring kid, a nice kid. I
had a loving family but I was missing one crucial
aspect of my life. I had no friends. Most people
flat out rejected me, and those that didn't weren't
friends with me because they feared they would be made
fun of for being friends with me.
Eventually the fear turned to pain. By age 11 I had
to visit a shrink every week! I felt I had no one to
talk to and no friends. Things did not change they
just became worse. By the end of my middle school
years the goal of some of the kids was to see who
could get me to cry first. But I saw a light at the
end of the tunnel. High school would be different I
told myself. New school new people. I can make it, I
will be accepted. Things got off to a rough start
again. I became the butt of every joke again. That
spring I made the baseball team and even started on
the freshman team although no one expected me too. I
thought that playing baseball might help...NO! Still
the taunting. And even by then I had built a small
group of friends who, of which most didn't give a damn
about me anyway. Deep down I knew this and it hurt me
more.
That spring I took a weightlifting course at my high
school. It involved lifting 3 days per week. I still
remember the first day I touched a barbell. I bench
pressed 85 pounds 5 times. I felt like superman! I
enjoyed weightlifting and became somewhat good at it
for my size. I started the semester at 130 and ended
at 145 with a bench press of 155lbs and a squat of
225lbs. And a funny thing happened. People noticed
me. Not very much but they did notice. I saw my
opportunity to help myself. The first week of that
summer I borrowed every weightlifting book I could
from the library and read everything I could about it.
I started on a basic program. All I had was 70lbs of
sand weights to work with, but work with them I did.
I did my workouts religiously. That summer I realized
something about myself. I had turned my pain into
motivation. I was a man on a mission. I entered the
next school year at 155 lbs. I took the weightlifting
course again the fall semester and people once again
noticed. I got comments like "you look good Layne"
and "have you been working out." These were the first
nice things my peers had ever said to me...I loved it.
I started lifting even harder. By the next summer my
weight was 165 lbs and my bench press was 205lbs and I
was finally getting noticed.
Then disaster struck...In the form of my first
girlfriend. I spent all my time with her. I had
never gotten attention from girls before so when she
gave it too me I snatched it up. It was a bad
relationship and emotionally straining for me. I
stopped working out and when we broke up I become
SEVERELY depressed. This depression lasted for six
months and what made it hurt worse was that she
started dating some of my so called "friends." I lost
15 lbs and I felt like the world was closing in on me.
People were starting to mess with me all the time,
and I was still very torn up over Melissa. Then one
day I snapped. I made a decision that I would make
everyone who ever made fun of me sorry and I would
show everyone never to doubt me. I started lifting
with a ferocity I never had before. The pain turned
to rage. Every workout was a battle. I was battling
my demons and all the people that never accepted me
and never believed in me. Every rep of every set I
pushed myself to the max. By the end of my junior
year my weight had jumped from 152 (down from 165) to
170 lbs. I continued working out with unmatched
intensity over the summer. Unfortunately I only
worked upper body because at the time that's all I
cared about. By the beginning of my senior year I was
175 lbs and my bench press was 250 lbs! When I came
back to school no one could believe it was me. Then
my senior year I changed something. I started
watching my nutrition. I started eating more protein
and reading muscle magazines. Mid-way through the
first semester the weightlifting coach approached me.
He said "Layne I've been watching you and you have a
very strong bench press, if you can increase your
squat I would like to enter you in the Southern
Indiana Bench Press and Squat Championships." I
couldn't believe it. Me, in a competition. I
immediately started to work on my squat more and more.
By competition time in February my weight was 177lbs.
and my bench press was 300lbs and my squat was 300lbs.
However during the competition I only scored a 275 lb
lift on bench press. I tried 305 and failed and in a
bench press and squat competition once you select a
lift you cannot go below that weight. However I was
pleased with my squat which was 325lbs. I ended up
taking 5th in my class and I was ecstatic! The tables
were starting to turn for me. That's when I started
thinking about bodybuilding...
I liked weightlifting but I wanted to look good, real
good. I wanted to be bigger and be shredded. I
picked up my first FLEX magazine and started to look
through it. I read every magazine I could get my
hands on and I learned a lot about protein intake,
post workout nutrition, the importance of eating every
three hours etc. But there was one thing that stuck
with me when I read these magazines, the articles on
competition. I loved the idea of competition and
being onstage and showing the world what I had.
That's when it hit me, I didn't just want to be big, I
wanted to be as big as I possibly could naturally. I
wanted to compete, I wanted to win. I thought to
myself, "if I could win a bodybuilding contest it
would be vindication, I could show all those people
that doubted me and made fun of me all my life that I
am no joke, that I am for real." I made a lot of
gains in muscle between February of my Senior year and
graduation (May). I believe this was largely due to
the fact I was starting to follow a bodybuilding split
and I was recovering better since I was working out
each body part only once per week instead of 2 or 3
time per week. By this time I was about to graduate
and I was about 185 pounds, I had already made drastic
improvements but I wanted more. I trained very hard
over the summer and increased my weight to 190 lbs and
my bench press to 315 lbs on a one rep max. Now it
was time to go to college, and that's when it all
changed...
My next article will be on what happened that first 6
months in college that revolutionized my body and the
way I lifted.
biolayne@yahoo.com
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