When Diet Disaster Strikes!

And that if they cheat on their diets the evil 'cheat fairy' will come with her whip and give you a thousand lashes until you cry so long you have burnt off all those extra calories

By now we have all read 6 billion articles about diet and how important nutrition is. How bodybuilders have to eat certain foods and certain times to be this or to be that. And that if they cheat on their diets the evil 'cheat fairy' will come with her whip and give you a thousand lashes until you cry so long you have burnt off all those extra calories.

Well rest at ease, I am here to rescue the maiden of chocolate from the grueling torture of isolation. To put away the fear that if you eat a slice of pizza, not only will your face break out in a thousand zits, but you will lose every last ounce of muscle you have put on in the last 20 years.

You'll end up looking smaller than you did before you started sucking down warm chalky protein shakes with chunks so big your dad had to stand behind on guard in case he had to perform the Heimlich. What I am saying, is that it's ok to cheat in moderation. Often times it's fun.

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Summer Cheating
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I have two ways of cheating, one is wintertime cheating and the other is summer time cheating. Let's talk about the summer one first, cause it's shorter. In the summer time my meals consist of what I have outlined in earlier articles, and about once a month I start going crazy and need some real food.

So what I do, keeping in mind the way I want to look for summer, I take two or three days off and eat something different, but not drastic. It will be some pasta, bread, pork, steak, restaurant food, maybe a little ice cream, a cookie or two. Just something to put my mind at ease.

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Winter Cheating
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But in the wintertime, this is a different story. My goal here is to become so big that I can't fit through doorways, so big that small planets gravitate towards me, so I don't care what I am eating as long as it has a lot of calories in it.

In the wintertime I usually pick Sunday as my cheat day. This is probably the hardest I work all week long, I take this day seriously. If you aren't ready for this day of eating, keep sleeping.

I start it out at the donut showcase at Wal-Mart with a gallon of chocolate milk in one hand, a glove in the other and probably the second biggest smile you will ever see me have! I open up the door and begin to eat donuts, pastries and cookies until I get kicked out.

Donut
Enlarge Click Image To Enlarge.
I Start Out At The Donut Showcase.

I can usually get in 12-15 before I find myself hurled out the door by some old man with nose hairs longer than my arms. My second meal of the day comes from Domino's pizza. XL Mega Deal Deep Dish with pepperoni, bacon, and mushrooms. That takes about 3 seconds to toss down my throat.

My third meal, Asian Empire Buffet. This is probably the most prestigious oriental buffet in the state with over 200 items and a Hibachi bar. I go for the Hibachi bar. Load up a plate with chicken, shrimp, beef, shrooms and noodles. Plate after plate after plate. The cook swears I cut in line.

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I usually eat up, take a nap in a booth then eat some more. And before I take off I get a big plate of ice cream and some deep fried cherry turnovers, just to settle my stomach. Then, before I go to bed I try to get some more ice cream and cookies just to snack on.

Then I wake up Monday morning feeling refreshed and ready to go, on top of the world and unstoppable. My Monday workout is awesome having all those carbs in me.

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Conclusion
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Cheating is somewhat beneficial, it fills in the void spots for missing nutrients that sometimes bodybuilders don't get with the restricted diet. It also helps you keep your sanity. And for me, every time I do it I get sick and ask myself why I did it. Then it's just longer until the next time I do it. Hopefully, by the way things are progressing I won't cheat in the future. We'll see.