You're mom thinks you're embarrassing the family by wearing one and you've heard all the jokes from your friends - man panties, banana hammock, etc - And even though they'd never admit it - even the guys with great legs wish they didn't have to wear them. But there's no getting around it boys... before you're first show you'll have to buy yourself a pair of posing trunks.
Going into this you might think buying posing trunks is like buying yourself a swim suit. And it kind of is - if you're an Olympic swimmer or entering a fitness or figure competition. Thanks to Michael Jordan short shorts went out a long time ago for men, which only adds to the confusion and embarrassment that comes from picking out you're first posing suit when you know no man has worn anything this short, bikini briefs included, since the 1980s.
I'd like to tell you - "relax, there are charts out that will help you." And guess what, there are charts. Charts that throw phrases around like, "sits high on the hips" and "a full cut back." And my personal favorite, "dips low in the front" (even with the picture, I'm still not sure what's dipping in the front). And don't forget the style choices you'll have to choose from - you've got Pro, American, Classic and European to name just a few.
Then there's the charts that talk about what color will look good with your skin tone. Hmm - I didn't know there was a skin tone for hot pink.
Can I get a chart to explain the charts to me? Or maybe what trunks I should buy with the anticipated level of embarrassment I'll be feeling when I'm approximately 95 percent naked, oily and onstage flexing for all my friends, family and an auditorium full of strangers for the first time? Where's that chart?
Like anything else in this sport - I've learned the best thing to do is ask somebody who's worn these bad boys before. You can't exactly pick up a pair of posing trunks at the Gap, but the veterans will know where and who to send you to. Bodybuilding.com far and away has the best prices you'll find online for trunks in addition to a large selection of colors to choose from.
If you can't find someone to help out, just keep in mind everyone's skin tone is pretty much a shade of trophy bronze after the tanning dyes have been applied so wear what color and style you think looks the best on you. Bare in mind, dark colors will do a better job of hiding any body dye and oil that's spilled over onto your trunks after you've been painted. It's also a smart idea to bring a backup pair of trunks just in case.
In the end, think of picking out your posing trunks like picking out that pair of underwear you wear on date number three. Sure, you'll likely be a little embarrassed if you're seen in them later that night no matter how good you look, but at the end of the day you want a pair that instills some confidence in yourself for the big night ahead.